Nuance Dictionary / Culture & Language
미운 정 고운 정 mi-un jeong go-un jeong
Both annoying jeong and beautiful jeong — the full spectrum of accumulated feeling
What does 미운 정 고운 정 mean?
미운 정 고운 정 (mi-un jeong go-un jeong) means: Both annoying jeong and beautiful jeong — the full spectrum of accumulated feeling.
One of the most frequently quoted expressions in Korea regarding *jeong*. It highlights the paradox that you can actually develop *jeong*—a deep emotional bond—even for someone you dislike (often referred to as *miun-jeong*, or "affection born of dislike"). Ultimately, it is an expression that beautifully captures the intricate complexity of long-term relationships.
🔊 From the story above
정이 들다 — jeong-i deul-da, "for jeong to form"
어느새 정이 들었어 — eo-neu-sae jeong-i deu-reo-sseo, "Before I knew it, jeong had formed"
정 때문에 — jeong ttae-mu-ne, "because of jeong"
정 떼다 — jeong tte-da, "to sever the jeong bond"
정 끊다 — jeong kkeun-ta, "to cut off jeong"
한번 와서 밥 먹어 — han-beon wa-seo bap meo-geo, "Come over sometime and eat"
우리 엄마 — u-ri eom-ma, "our mom"
팍팍한 삶 — pak-pak-han sam, "a harsh, dry life"
Other sides of 미운 정 고운 정
◆ battle-tested workplace camaraderie — Textbooks teach you that 'jeong' is warm affection, but in a Korean office, it’s often 50% trauma bond. 미운 정 고운 정 describes the specific bond with that one coworker whose habits drive you insane, yet when push comes to shove, you’re in the trenches together. Natives use this when reflecting on years of shared overtime, botched client pitches, and mutual complaints. Learners often mistake it for a sweet friendship, missing the 'mi-un' (hateful/annoying) half of the equation—you still can't stand their desk organization, but nobody else is allowed to talk trash about them.
◆ post-passion marital realism — Textbooks love to translate this as 'love and hate,' but that misses the entire psychological landscape of Korean marriage. This isn't about emotional volatility; it's the specific realization that you find your spouse deeply annoying yet entirely indispensable. When older Koreans use this regarding their partner of thirty years, it signals an acceptance of mutual flaws—a state where romance is long dead, but a terrifyingly permanent loyalty has taken its place.
◆ love-hate fandom loyalty — Textbooks teach you this phrase is about old couples or lifelong friends, but modern Koreans reach for it most often when defending their toxic fandom or eternally cursed baseball team. It signals a self-aware exhaustion—you are rolling your eyes so hard your head hurts, yet you are still buying the merch and tuning in for next season's disappointment. Learners mess this up by treating it like mere 'ambivalence'; it's not lukewarm, it's a passionate, scarred devotion you can't quit even if you wanted to.
◆ post-passion marital realism — Textbooks love to translate this as 'love and hate,' but that misses the entire psychological landscape of Korean marriage. This isn't about emotional volatility; it's the specific realization that you find your spouse deeply annoying yet entirely indispensable. When older Koreans use this regarding their partner of thirty years, it signals an acceptance of mutual flaws—a state where romance is long dead, but a terrifyingly permanent loyalty has taken its place.
◆ love-hate fandom loyalty — Textbooks teach you this phrase is about old couples or lifelong friends, but modern Koreans reach for it most often when defending their toxic fandom or eternally cursed baseball team. It signals a self-aware exhaustion—you are rolling your eyes so hard your head hurts, yet you are still buying the merch and tuning in for next season's disappointment. Learners mess this up by treating it like mere 'ambivalence'; it's not lukewarm, it's a passionate, scarred devotion you can't quit even if you wanted to.
How it's actually used
- 티격태격해도 미운 정 고운 정 다 들어서 이제 가족 같아요.
Tigyeoktaegyeokhaedo miun jeong goun jeong da deureoseo ije gajok gatayo.
We bicker, but after all the love and annoyance built up, we're like family now.
💡 Describes complex relationships where both frustration and affection coexist. - 오래 살다 보면 미운 정 고운 정 다 쌓이는 거지 뭐.
Orae salda bomyeon miun jeong goun jeong da ssaineun geoji mwo.
When you live together for a long time, you naturally accumulate all sorts of feelings—both bad and good.
💡 Often used philosophically about long-term marriages or friendships. - 십 년을 같이 일하다 보니 미운 정 고운 정이 다 들어서 헤어지기가 정말 아쉽네요.
sip nyeoneul gachi ilhada boni miun jeong goun jeongi da deureoseo heeojigiga jeongmal aswipneyo.
Having worked together for ten years, we've developed all kinds of affection—both the annoying and the endearing kinds—so it's really sad to part ways.
💡 Commonly used when describing long-term colleagues or family members.
Related words in Culture & Language
팍팍하다 pak-pak-ha-da서비스 seo-bi-seu정나미가 떨어지다 jeong-na-mi-ga tteo-reo-ji-da한 (恨) han억울하다 eok-ul-ha-da